1. |
showing up in clouds
02:53
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while you were sleeping on the couch
i thought about walking out and driving back to the national park
shouldn’t have made it a last minute thing to see the stars in cherry spring
but that’s just me, showing up in clouds
earlier on we stopped to brave
a mangled bridge over a range of all the different shades of green
but now you wouldn’t wait all night in case the weather app was right
and it would clear up after three
the wedding was the best one yet, my brother’s love was evident
and my whole family fell for you meantime
i’d been nervous for the speech i couldn’t bear to let you read
but that’s just me, afraid to take advice
almost entirely overcast, could only see one measly patch
that drifted across the expanse
you asked if i’d seen that before, tugging my eyes from the floor
but that’s just you, pulling me to dance
all the times i’ve laid awake and wondered which of us will break and if we’re just too different
these might be the cards i hold
the laundry i will never fold
the grievances i will not put to bed
until you come and find me in my head
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2. |
midas
04:50
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you have the midas touch
feel the metal in everything
been around long enough
to have what you’re handling
but you’ll lose it too
the fool in you
you’ll lose it too
you have the midas touch
and nothing will be the same
it’s all getting through the glove
anything you can name
you’ll lose it too
the fool in you
you’ll lose it too
you have the midas touch
keep everything apart
hold out for the taste of love
hold out for the change of heart
you’ll lose it too
the fool in you
you’ll lose it too
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3. |
valentine's day
02:26
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we set out for upstate on valentine’s day
i bought you pretty flowers you had to hold the whole way
the lovebirds up in front were flapping on about their love
as i DJ’d from the back seat wishing somebody would turn the volume up
we arrived well after midnight to the chateau in the trees
her folks were set to sell the place so she spent the four nights torn between her privilege and grief
i did okay the first day but i only got more fragile
you tried including me with jokes and cutting digs that i would always then mishandle
i would always then mishandle
come on baby let’s unite the front
let’s batten down the hatches
though the only time we have alone is sleeping in the basement on a busted blow up mattress
let’s sing out all our favorite songs
let’s go and make it all about us
let’s ruin all the goodbyes and show them at the wrong times how we look in the good light
let’s move into the good light
let’s take up all the good light
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4. |
maine
04:08
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was all the way to maine
remembered it was yours
the drumming of the waves
the screaming of the shore
and i was sure
i could find it
if no one was watching
but i was blinded
tidepool eyesore
but i was light then
i was light then
i was light then
i was light
had to jump into the lake
to feel how down it goes
your secrets all are safe
right there in a row
in a row
and all that i'd give
through a fog unlocking
couldn't hide it
tidepool eyesore
but i was light then
i was light then
i was light then
i was light
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5. |
that frozen garden
03:14
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is this that frozen garden
you almost fall apart in
but then you stone into a swan again
and fly the fountain dry
is this that goddamn garden
i almost fall apart in
but then i swing into a song
and wonder why the fountain died
is this that frozen garden
that no one thought of starting
that they let burn into a swamp
and come july they'll say we tried
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6. |
||||
a book made me feel better about living
so i bought a stone to commemorate the feeling
and i didn’t seem to spiral when i had it in my pocket
but then i lost it and that was part of what it meant
took a walk and talked about what happened with this weekend
was feeling all strong but then you got me on the defense
but you said a lot of stuff that i’m excited to let seep in
and then pretend that i thought of it myself
or that i came across it in a book
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7. |
figure eights
04:07
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feeling in figure eights
cursing the city walls
nothing accumulates
and destiny never calls
remember the church they made
the roof that could not be built
so they just left a hole
and one day they found it filled
we came to this full stop running
lost our faith while jumping
friends say they saw it coming
but what do they know, little know it alls
stepped off the new year floor
needed another a breath
it was an older tune
the fogies were owning it
was months till i said a word
who knows what was in your head
if i could get back there now
don’t know what i’d do instead
we came to this full stop running
found our faith while jumping
friends say they saw it coming
but what do they know, little know it alls
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8. |
the landing
03:17
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oh my poet in the white grove
my poseidon in the sea foam
madhatter laughing patterns while you’re taking in the show
don’t tell anyone i’m rattled
plucking every flower petal
as more chariots keep entering the battlefield below
i want to find the landing
be the one to find the landing
and be defined by the landing
i kind of want to be the landing
then i want to hide the landing
and someday die on the landing
if i could only find the landing
if we could only find the landing
oh my mother gone too soon
wish you could have heard the loon
couldn’t bring myself to ask but then you showed up in the moon
and my petty little secret,
and i don’t know why i keep it,
is i’m in it for the glory, i don’t care about the view
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9. |
keep an eye on myself
01:59
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keep an eye on myself
such a dummy ain’t it funny i can feel my felt
talk in circles but the spin doesn’t help
keep an eye on myself
i’m camera cursed
got a vision of the kitchen where i die of thirst
close enough to somebody else
to keep an eye only myself
my rainbow’s wet
i’m such a fuck in this fucking mess
climbed up to the top of my shelf
just to keep an eye on myself
all to keep an eye on myself
gotta keep an eye on myself
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10. |
hide!
03:19
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if you let me hide i will
you'd probably find me still
woke up miserable
afraid i'd dreamed it all
you’re too nice to me, too nice!
was in my head today
you pulled the wool away
wasn't ready yet
didn't know what ready meant
you’re too nice to me, too nice!
you were crying low
at our tv show
didn’t care that it
seemed impossible
you’re too nice to me, too nice!
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